Bruce Willis Walks Into a Rite Aid

Have you ever heard the well-known saying “The hills have eyes”? What about the other famous one “The hills have eyes 2”? Great! Now here is a third: The aisles in the Hills have eyes as well. Specifically, the aisles in Rite Aid, where Bruce Willis went to do some convenience shopping this week.

Willis was told on for refusing to wear his mask, and then was asked to leave, according to Page Six and its spies. In the photo that accompanied the report, Willis had a bandana tied around his neck, but, apparently, it was just decorative—a little flair for going out to buy, I dunno, razors, some paper towels, and a large bag of Doritos—because he refused to pull it up and over his mouth and nose. The virus has Los Angeles under its thumb right now; there have been more than 30,000 deaths in California so far, and it’s hit Southern California especially hard.

Willis didn’t respond to comments initially, but look who’s talking now: “It was an error in judgment. Be safe out there everyone and let’s continue to mask up,” Willis told People.

Anyway, his was a bad day for a famous man with the opportunity to set an example during a difficult time, but it was a good day for dark references to Willis’s death-y movie titles: There’s First Kill, Death Becomes Her, Die Hard, Die Hard 2, Die Hard With a Vengeance, Live Free or Die Hard, and A Good Day to Die Hard. There’s, unfortunately, also Armageddon, Last Man Standing, and Planet Terror. There’s Breach, too, which could be something if you’re really creative, and The Expendables, if you’re a Republican. 

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